Original Scaredate: June 10, 1989
Director: Robert Zemekis
Writer: Fred Dekker
Starring: Mary Ellen Trainor, Marshall Bell (for a few seconds, anyway), Larry Drake, and John Kassir
Quick Kill: Here comes Santa Claus, here comes Santa Claus...to kill you!
Review: Jesus, the Cryptkeeper's Santa mask is horrifying. It's our first glimpse of the Keeper in costume, which would become a series mainstay as things went on.
Right away, as the episode starts, there's a nice juxtaposition in playing Nat King Cole's The Christmas Song balanced against the horror we know must be coming. And quickly, there it is, as Elizabeth (Trainor) attacks her husband Joseph (Bell) with the fireplace poker. After she puts her daughter, who swears she has heard Santa, back to bed, we get our motive. It's that EC classic of money plus adultery (here with the grossly named "The Vic Monster").
What follows is a well executed sequence as Elizabeth tries to dump Joseph's not-so-dead body while conveniently missing the escaped psychotic dressed as Santa headline playing on the radio. It's quiet...too quiet, and then, heeeeere's Santa (Drake).
In fighting the madman off (and she believes, knocking him out), Elizabeth gets ahold of Santa's axe, as well as some information from the police about the murderer loose in the neighborhood. Those gears of evil start turning as Elizabeth spins the murderous Kringle to her advantage, hacking up Joseph's body with the axe and then calling the cops. Elizabeth then manages to get stuck in the closet as she searches for Joseph's gun, all the while watching Santa climb toward her daughter's window.
The episode ends with a fantastic tag sequence. Little Carrie has let Saint Nick in, and Trainor breaks down while Drake gets his only line of the episode: "Naughty...or Nice?"
In my opinion, "All Through the House" is the first classic episode of Tales' run. In its 22 minute running time, it encapsulates many of the types of horror. It's got genuine tension, good jump scares, and a real sense of dread (particularly when Santa is climbing the ladder toward Carrie). It's quintessentially a slasher piece, and is thus a little light on the series' trademark humor, but the horror makes up for it.
Trainor puts in an all-out scream queen performance once the episode kicks into high gear, but she's also good in the early going as a conniving killer. And Drake is a fantastic monster. He plays his role with mindless psychotic glee, and delivers his one line perfectly. Bell, by virtue of his role, isn't really given much to do, and the daughter is serviceable.
Zemekis' direction is excellent, and never feels constrained by the TV budget/time. He adds some nice touches (the disappearing axe), and crafts a satisfying bite-sized slasher movie. And knowing where he would go in the future, does anyone else wish that Santa Drake had showed up on The Polar Express? It would have been a much more interesting addition than elven Aerosmith.
Fred Dekker's (The Monster Squad, Night of the Creeps) script is also a highlight, with solid story structure and some wonderful touches of dialogue.
It's a sign of the greatness to come that the series was able to produce something this strong and fully realized so early in the run.
Also, for the EC comics fiends, there are a couple of nice shout-outs to creators William M. Gaines and Al Feldstein
Best Death: There's only one onscreen death in the episode, but it's a good one, as Elizabeth gives Joseph that poker to the head. He is then left in silly, open-mouthed shock as and after Elizabeth works to remove the tool.
Creeper Corner: Well, unless you have a Santa fetish, you're going to go away disappointed this time.
Cryptkeeper's Line of the Week: "Be careful what you axe for. You just might GET IT!"
Episode Rating: 4 out of 4 Cryptkeepers
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